Dear Adoption, In a World of Labels & Standards You Left Me Not Being Enough

You left me with a story unknown.

You left me with a constant perpetual desire to be someone I no longer can be.

You left me with a longing in my heart nothing can fulfill.

You left me with a community I can’t relate with.

You left me with a roller coaster of feelings.

Not Chinese Enough

        Not Asian Enough

                                                           Not Deaf Enough

            Not Hearing Enough

Not Immigrant Enough

            Not Adoptee Enough

Not Enough.

Always found between two points.

                         All because my experiences are not the same as others.

               I share as if a wooden fence was between us. I share just enough for you to see parts of me but not me completely. Fear yet aching, to be understood, to have my feelings matter, to be heard…to be loved for who I am.

Yet I am loving life: the opportunities

                              the people I have encountered

                              relationships which have formed

                              my unique experience

All which have allowed me to have a unique perspective in life and understanding of people.

               You bring the worst in me and the best in me.

You gave me a heart to reject the world. You gave me a heart to change the world.

International adoptee born in China. Came to America at almost a year old. Recently graduated with a B.S. in Kinesiology and Minor in Deaf Studies and will be attending a DPT program in the Fall. Hopes and passions include going back to China one day to serve.