Dear Adoption, It Hurts

It hurts that my mother doesn’t think about me.
It hurts that my mother stripped me from the family tree. 

It hurts that my mother never wanted me to stay.
It hurts that my mother immediately gave me away.

It hurts that my mother separated me from her family. 
It hurts that my mother wiped me away from her memory.

It hurts that my mother wasn’t the one to give me a name. 
It hurts that my mother connects my existence to shame. 

It hurts that my mother will never see my face.
It hurts that my mother had me vanish without a trace.

It hurts that my mother endured such a difficult trial. 
It hurts that my mother lived a life of denial

It hurts that my mother felt defeated at such a young age.
It hurts that that my mother was forced to turn the page.

It hurts that my mother will never be whole.
It hurts that my mother may have lost her soul.

Dirk Uphoff is a domestic transracial adoptee who was adopted at 3 weeks old during the baby scoop era. He grew up in the Midwest, but now lives in Phoenix with his wife of 33 years. They have four grown kids and enjoy going to the gym.