gallery Dear Adoption, Why is it So Hard? / Part 1

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Why is it so hard? / Part 1

Why is it so hard?

That’s what my mom said to me the couple of times I said being adopted was hard.

Why is it so hard? You have two families who love you. One loved you enough to give you away. The other loved you enough to take you in.

Why is it so hard? There are two other Asian kids in your youth group. Why don’t you guys all hang out if you need to be around other brown people?

Why is it so hard? We saved your baby shoes.

Why is it so hard? You never met your birth mom. She was just the body God used to bring you to your real family. Isn’t that beautiful?

Why is it so hard? You should be thankful for everything you have. I can’t imagine what your life would be like if we hadn’t adopted you.

Why is it so hard? You can talk to us about adoption anytime.

My parents love me. They actually do. They just don’t get it or me. I can’t talk to them about adoption and I don’t anymore. I can only talk to people who don’t know me, like you, Adoption, and I actually don’t have to ask you why it is so hard because you already know even though you pretend not to.

Read Part 2: Dear Adoption, Do You Know What Love Is?

This piece was submitted anonymously by a 16 year old adoptee from South Korea.

7 comments

  1. Thank you for sharing this. Many adoptive parents fail to understand what adoptees go though.. Their lack of understanding and often unwillingness to understand pushes us away from them a bit or a lot.

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  2. This touched me, and put into words things I didn’t even know I was feeling when I was 16 years old. Your insight and honesty are amazing. Don’t let it get you down! You are so much more than an adoptee (but always that, too).

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  3. “She was just the body God used to bring you to your real family. Isn’t that beautiful?” As a first mother (“birth mother”), I was the body God used to bring my son to his adopters. Adoption filled a hole in one family — and left a hole in my family and in my heart.

    Like

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